let's live here

11:47 AM

to all my girlfriends: LETS LIVE HERE!:D and go on crazy girl-powered adventures punctuated by all things sweet and sugary. I am especially channeling carla as we pretty much share the same design aesthetic, although this may be a wee bit too pink for her..

p.s boys are welcome too, if they wouldn't mind all the pink :p

I got this photo off apartmenttherapy.com who says that it was off domino magazine

Labels: boyfriends and girlfriends, home, pink, spaces

sam

the zit-to-be

11:31 AM

i am annoyed. i woke up this morning to a pulsating, painfully throbbing soon-to-be zit on my chin. aarrrgggghhhh...i thought these kinds of problems haunt you when you're 12, 15, 17 or 19, but not at 23. it hurts, its annoying, it makes me look like i have a chin cleft and i can actually feel it get bigger and bigger by the minute!!! i've attempted to stunt its growth by placing ice cubes over it, but now that the ice has melted away, its just starting to hurt again. what should i do????? hmph.

Labels: girl woes, grrrrrrrrrr, zit

sam

just like the movies

11:41 PM

the future scared me today. no, not in the "end of the world sense" but in the relationship with my significant other sense. we used to be so sure- sure of when the next time we would see each other;sure that between those times we would be willing and able to wait; sure that we would be able to endure everything in between until that fateful day when no one would have to take the other to the airport.

but what have 2 years, 5 months and a day taught me?! it is the bitter fact that a 9 whole months without seeing each other is an impossibility and drives the both of you ugly-crazy.this particular lesson made me realize why a human pregnancy is only supposed to last 9 months (the pregnant lady goes berserk pretty soon). another lesson: 5 months is my threshold. i get cranky, cry-y, depressed and pretty hopeless.it is embarrassing that the boyfriend can last waayyyy longer and has to be the recipient of all this angst.third, and my painful lesson for the day is the plain and simple fact that you cannot let someone, irregardless of how much he loves you wait and wait, when even you yourself have no idea of when you're actually coming.

so amidst the tears (and boy were there a lot, especially on my end), an agreement was made today. if this certain detail didn't work itself out by may, then we say our goodbyes. hopefully not forever though- i hopefully have this 6-9 month stint that i am looking into and he has school for another 6 months. the catch was to go on with each's own lives and let fate take its course, and then when we wouldn't have to make each other wait anymore, we would go find each other, just like in the movies.

and where would we find each other? of course new york! (italy is being considered too), just like in the movies. we could do the whole meeting at the empire state state building ala an affair to remember. the italy scenario is more dramatic though- he would knock on my door, after having flown all the way from australia, only to have a gorgeous guy open the door. he then walks away dejectedly and i chase him down the streets of florence. you do realize though that there is a slight drizzle at this very moment. i catch up with him and explain that what he thought was a mistake, the guy that opened the door wasn't my guy, he was in fact my gay-my gay friend! and then right then and there we would kiss.say it with me now- JUST LIKE THE MOVIES.

while it feels a little giddy to imagine all these "endings" for us, the one thing that i fervently hope for is that we don't have to end. so that thing in may, please work out, because down the line, i don't want to be that girl who just sits and cries by her rainy window, just like the movies. :(



p.s i don't want to sound so full of myself and delusional but i couldn't help but notice based on the number counter thingy that there are some people out there who actually read my ramblings. i don't know whether it is because you have nothing better to do/find me and my posts crazy/can relate/hate me/ pity me/ or actually enjoy my writing. but whatever your reason is, please say hello on the hsoutbox, i don't care what you wanna put there as long as you put something to stop my paranoria that strangers are reading about my life. think about it this way, f you put something and i reply, we become acquaintances and therefore no longer stangers and therefore no more reason for paranoria, ok? thanks a lot :p

Labels: boyfriend woes, ldr, ps, sad princess, whining

sam

China envy

2:53 PM

I don't know if this counts for wedding china, or if it even counts for china at all, but i saw this over at decor8.blogspot.com and ahhhloveeettt! Please please please when I get married, or when I have a new house or whenever you feel like it, i would luuuuvvvvv to receive this, ohhhkaaayyyy?????? :D thanks in advance :p

Labels: china, domestic, shopping

sam

don't even say it cos i don't wanna to hear it

1:35 PM

do you have a least favorite word in the whole entire universe? i do!!!! wanna know what it is? well, its no!

i HATE HATE HATE HATE hearing the word no. I hate it with the fire of a thousand suns. It sends my blood pressure boiling and my temples throbbing. Skirt around it, use other words, convince me otherwise, change the subject, I DON"T CARE!!! Just don't say that word to me, or you can, if you are spoiling for a fight!


I hate it! HATE IT! HATE IT! did i mention that i HATED hearing no??!!!!




P.S this is angry me releasing some steam

Labels: grrrrrrrrrr

sam

amen

9:20 AM

Maybe it's the looming Christmas season, or maybe its the nonstop barrage of information from the internets (yes, i meant to spell it with the s :p)of celebrities latest delvings and whatnot, but for about a month now, I've had conversations from different people about faith, spirituality and one's personal relationship with it.

How does spirituality really fit into one's definition of "me" is a relative question actually, and is totally dependent to how a person lets it encompass his personal definition. For those who are atheist, faith in a higher being is as good as nonexistent. How dare anyone suggest that there is something higher, stronger, and more powerful that exerts control over one's life! The atheist is master of his fate, and captain of his ship and all that jazz, and you better not mess with that! For the agnostics, perhaps there is a flittering idea of a higher being up there, and spirituality is defined not in real and concrete images but in real and concrete ideas of doing good, not hurting anyone, and being honest with oneself.

I am not speaking as an expert here by any means, but for myself, as a Catholic Christian, my faith and spirituality are in fact defined in concrete images. Love is Jesus' crucifixion. I see compassion in the Blessed Mother's eyes. Brotherhood from the disciples and peace of mind heart and soul from the dove that is the Holy Spirit.

Maybe it was those 24 units of Philosophy and Theology that I had to endure while I was in school, but I find that I actually like my relationship with my faith. I am satisfied with what I have, grateful for what I know, love what I discover and am mystified with the bits that cannot be explained.I also have moments of irritation and frustration with its rigidity and impracticality too, but have learned to accept that this is normal in any relationship.Despite the good and bad though, I am solidly rooted in my Christianity. I feel that it is actually a defining aspect of who I am, from the traditions that I continue to perform to the values that I uphold.

However, this is not to say that I have chosen to remain ignorant to the rest of the world's varied faiths. Some philosophies speak strongly to me too- the lure of karma forever reminds me to be careful of the repercussions of my actions. I am enamored with the Muslim's total and complete surrender to their faith. I continue to be in awe by the deaths of so many Jews in the name of their religion and I am inspired with the beauty of Shintoism's affinity to nature and the Spirits.


There are some things too that I draw the line at. An attraction to a red evil eye bracelet, or to put it more succinctly, an admiration for the sweet young thing who dons the said bracelet shouldn't be the reason to embrace a new religion. Neither is a celebrity's newfound svelte figure that he credits to some bizarre yoga exercise that was dictated by his supposed newfound spirituality.While it is an appealing idea to share something as intimate as spirituality as someone that we admire, isn't that kind of going besides the point of faith?! Faith is something that you carry with you forever-much like a tattoo and not some fashion accessory that you take off once the season is over.


At the end of the day, I don't think that it should be an organized body of beliefs and traditions created and promoted by mere humans that defines our spirituality. I think it should be a mish-mash of whatever and whoever it is that calls out and actually stirs our hearts (remember, i said hearts and not our fashion sensibilities!). There is certainly no harm in taking a little from this and a bit of that for upon close inspection, isn't that exactly what the world's major faith have done with one another?! Amen. :)

Labels: faith, random, religion, spirituality

sam

damn you starbucks!

11:54 AM

the hunt for the elusive starbucks planner has driven me into new scales of crazy than normal! i've got 7 stickers to go- problem is those are the stickers that require me to purchase the holiday drinks, and frankly, none of them are very appealing to me. why i don't get myself a cuter (and i bet cheaper) planner is a mystery to me. but like the gullible consumer that i am, i totally fell head over heels over their sneaky and manipulative marketing scheme. besides, i've started it and my obsessive compulsive personality requires me not to stop.

and with that, i've got nothing left to say but... tofee nut/praline/ peppermint mocha latte anyone???!!!

Labels: starbucks planner

sam

salamat

10:25 AM

i'm no american, and so i normally do not celebrate thanksgiving, but in the spirit of the season, and that fact that i loooove making lists, ive decided to stop for a moment and review what i'm thankful for this year.


Besides the obvious (family, friends, a comfortable life), This year I'm thankful for...

1.DSL internet connection actually making it into my house (that goes for cable too)
2.ebay
3.my boyfriend's infinite patience (and generosity)
4.jollibee overload fries
5.scrapetorrent
6.blogs
7.keiko
8.thermage :p
9.an "accessible" address (people used to get horrified that i lived "on another island" pa)
10.cheap thrills
11. new options, new choices, possible new career paths
12. kinaham
13. youtube and indian videos :p

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! :D

Labels: thankful princess, thanksgiving

sam

i scream, you scream, we all scream for...

1:53 PM

no, not ice cream but rather, Coney Island's Eskimo Roll!! AAHHHHH!!! love.

When I was little, I readily ignored the lure of those colorful scoop ice cream displays at the Coney Island across Fooda. I'd go strsight for my Eskimo Roll. No fluffy pink or blue concoction was going to make up for the plain vanilla ice cream sandwiched between 2 huge chocolate chip cookies with a healthy sprinkling of nuts and heaenly goodness. sooooo orgasmic :p

Sadly, that Coney Island closed down and I lost contact with my Eskimo Roll- UNTIL one day, we were reunited at the shop outside school that sold a smattering of coney island products. I didn't care that it was a whopping 20 pesos then, I made sure to scrimp so I would have my eskimo roll after a grueling day of school.

The reunion was short-lived though. I lost my Eskimo roll again. For good this time- when the coney island ice cream company permanently closed. SOB.

I missed it so much today that I attempted to make my own. I changed it a little, double choc chips for cookies and double dutch ice cream inside. Its currently downstairs freezing. I might or might not take a picture to show you.

I do know one thing though even before I've had a taste. It won't compare to the eskimo roll that I once knew and oh so loved...

Hmmm, next time, i might attempt to recreate the original, with the plain chocolate chip cookies and the plain vanilla...SOB SOB SOB

btw, excuse the rather emotional tribute to something as mundane as ice cream. i'm strange (and hormonal) like that.

a valiant effort, but still not good enough...

Labels: a tribute to ice cream, eskimo roll, gorging, random, reminiscing, sad princess

sam

sulpliiiseeeeee!!!

10:31 AM

i love surprises!!! more thn anyone else in the world methinks!!! soooo...wheres mine???!!! hmph!

Labels: sulplise, whining

sam

weight update (i can rhyme! :))

10:00 AM

woohoo! i weighed in per usual after i got up and was ecstatic to see the scale move back another 2 lbs! 112 lbs!!! ahloveit!!!!! only 2 more lbs to go until i get my "required" weight that my dietitian and I agreed on. Now, what to do about that - 1 inch???!!!

let's just hope that it doesn't crash and fall come the holiday season, as fiesta a.k.a gorging officially begins today! A little help, God?!?!

Labels: gorging, weight loss

sam

cuckoo

3:50 PM

in the mornings, i am some semblance of normal. i wake up and i function. but at night, (these past nights anyway), i can't help but cry and sob and wail. i cry for reasons that i know of and reasons that i do not know of yet. i just cry.

and then i sleep.
and then it starts all over again.

i have officially gone mad.

Labels: crazy princess, cuckoo

sam

Confession time

3:45 AM

i'm guilty and it's time i confess. i'm jealous of my friend. while im soo ecstatic that she's found a new hand to hold, and someone to get kilig over (i don't really know if she really is kilig- to be honest), i'm jealous too. i want my own hand holding partner, and someone physically present to catch me from my dramatic swoon because he said the most swoon worthy line (i will leave you to imagine what that line is to you lest i make you gag). i want the physical contact, the physical nauseauting mushiness. i want. i want. i want. i want a date to this ball thing (if i end up going! and if friend will have a date, and i undoubtedly think she will, i want them to have a great mushy time without the annoying third wheeler a.k.a MEEEE). i want it to be fun prom night.sigh sigh. i want my baby here.i want my someone to be here with me too.:(... and if that makes me the green eyed monster then i'm guilty as charged. i confess.

Labels: baby, friendship, jealous princess, missing

sam

boo (not the halloween kind)

8:50 PM

staying at home on a friday night with a bad case of dysmenorrhea is enough to mke even the most optimistic and bright eyed female feel sorry for herself. you are oh so bloated, in constant and unreleived pain, and you feel the label "loser" creep slowly in from your back, up your neck and plant itself atop you're pretty little head. this feeling is worthy punishment recommended to anyone's worst enemy. i guess there's nothing else left to say but "BOO". (although i am somewhat relieved that i could not go on that boracay trip. being on a nice beach and not being able to swim or even frolic in a cute little bikini (blame it on the bloated condition previously mentioned) must be torture a million times over). again, no words but BOOOOO.

Labels: boo, loser, whining

sam

ummm....just wondering

9:30 AM

to you:

what's up with all the dirty looks? did i offend your sensibilities? im a little weirded out. seriously. sigh

anyway, you know you love me....or maybe not.haha.xoxo :D

Labels: dirty looks, weirded out

sam

what's new with me

2:38 AM

I haven't posted in FOREVER, it seems. I've been delving in a little bit of everything, some old, some new, and a lot of random. This is a quick catch-up of what i've been up to- (come to think of it, i think i'm writing this to get the feel of writing again, much like putting a bit of oil into a rusty, old and unused typewriter)

in my absence, i have:

1.gone to manila to see my college friends and fetch my sister
2.finally finally lost enough weight to breakthrough that stubborn-this-is-as-low-as-i-go weight (114 baby!!! and i'm actually liking what i see)
3.got my hair permed (big huge waves)
4.found out i have a little heart thing (so when i say my heart hurts, it is not some talk on heartbreak or boyfriend woes, but rather it is a slight mitral valve prolapse)
5.got myself a dietitian (who says i can still lose 4 lbs easily, and must, as well as an inch of my waist by the time i see her again)
6.toying with the idea of becoming a temporary barrista (as i have resorted to drinking coffee again after the 2 year drought!)
7.been toying with the idea of further education
8.developed a seemingly incurable appetite for all food that is mexican or maybe it's just those jollibee overload fries...
9.started up on my "smart" and "bimbo" book reading again
10.found out about my insatiable appetite for design and home decorating blogs
11.caught up with the real movie classics
12.been continuously fighting my ebay and shoe obsession to no success!
13.am still obsessed with my downloads and tv shows!

a few pictures to erase some more of the fuzziness...








ahhh.such is the life of a happy bum...:D

Labels: absence, back

sam